We have all been there, embarrassingly looking around the room, or sheepishly at the floor as some poor soul gives a train wreck of a speech on the wedding day. If you have just been asked to be a Maid of Honor or Best Man one of the duties of this coveted role is to give a wedding toast during the reception. Here are a few simple tips to give a great, not cringe-worthy, wedding toast.

Prepare in advance

Just like the legendary basketball coach John Wooden said, “Failure to prepare, is preparing to fail.” This toast is a big deal, which is why your friend has trusted you with it in the first place. Honor that by putting in some time and work. Do not wait until the night before to start thinking about what you are going to say.

Don’t drink too much before you get the mic

Hopefully this is pretty self-explanatory.

Remember the purpose

This is not the time to tell embarrassing stories about the bride or groom. It’s a toast, NOT a roast. Your purpose is to congratulate, celebrate, and extend well wishes. So keep the wild stories of that one night for another time.

Speak to both the bride and groom

Whether your closer to the bride or the groom, make sure you give attention to both. The whole wedding day is about the two of them coming together and becoming one so make sure you address each of them. They’re in it together from here on out.

Forget about yourself

This moment is not about you, or about a performance. Once you let that sink in, you can free yourself from the pressure of being perfect and just speak from the heart. What an incredible moment for the couple and for your friendship, take it in and be in the moment. Look at your friends as you address them. Don’t read from your phone, you can do better than that.

You can do this!